Self-Publishing: Because Who Needs Sanity Anyway?

Alright, last time I promised you some additional details on the process. So, I hope you are ready, because we’re diving into the not-so-glamorous side of being an author—the art (or madness?) of formatting a book. I thought the hard part would be writing the book itself. Silly me. Turns out, getting the damn thing to look right on Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP), Ingram Spark, and Barnes & Noble is worse than trying to assemble IKEA furniture with no instructions and three missing screws. It’s chaotic, frustrating, surrounded by tiny Allen wrenches and mystery pieces.

Let’s Start with the Basics: Microsoft Word, My Frenemy

When I started, I thought, “Hey, how hard can this be? I’ve got Microsoft Word.” Ah, a sweet summer child I was... Word is a solid tool—for writing your college essay or sending a nice thank-you note. But when it comes to making a book that actually looks good on a Kindle, in print, and everywhere else? That’s when Word reveals its true nature as a sadistic overlord.

Margins? Good luck getting those consistent. Page breaks? More like page mayhem. And let’s not even talk about images—because Word sure doesn’t want to. So after hours of tweaking, reformatting, and cursing at my screen, I cried, “Somebody Save Me!”

(Jelly Roll plays softly in the distance...)

Enter: Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP)

Now, Amazon’s Kindle Direct Publishing is a bit like the cool, edgy kid at school. They give you all the tools to publish your book, but they’re not going to hold your hand through the process. No, they expect you to already know what you’re doing. When I uploaded my manuscript, it looked great! Until it didn’t. Suddenly, page breaks were missing, fonts didn’t translate, and my “perfect” manuscript had more formatting issues than my MySpace page in 2005.

But hey, KDP is forgiving. You can upload a new version pretty easily, so after enough trial and error, I figured it out. Kind of.

But, that's just the print version. Don't think you're done there. You can't really just take that PDF of the print version and upload it for eBook. You know why? eBook's don't have the same restrictions that a print book has. The reader can change the font size, your images need to be able to scale. Your 150 page book become a 2000 page book very quickly. So, all of the imagery and dramatic pauses you planned out in the  viewing of the print book-they don't translate well here.

Ingram Spark: The Love-Hate Relationship

Next up, Ingram Spark. This one’s a whole different beast, but it’s important for reaching stores like Target. It’s like the posh older sibling who demands everything be “just so.” Want to upload a book? Well, they want a specific PDF format, perfectly aligned margins, specific bleeds, embedded fonts, and a partridge in a pear tree while you’re at it.

I quickly realized that what worked on KDP did not translate well to Ingram Spark. Oh, and you can forget about uploading a new version as easily as you can on Amazon. Each upload costs money—so every mistake hurts just a little bit more.

After some trial, a lot of error, and finally finding a proper formatting tool (that didn’t make me want to throw my computer out the window), which ended up being the Ingram book creator tool. I got closer. I wouldn’t call it perfect, but it was good enough to keep me from pulling my hair out. And, let’s face it, I’ve already pulled out enough during this process, I need to keep what I have left.

Through a mixture of importing my existing PDF, tweaking in Ingrams tool,  and trial and error, I have something that is finally ready for review on their site. One quick warning about their site though, is that they don't have great error messages. So, something will not submit, but they won't necessarily tell you why. And, it could be because you have to do something on a completely different page to make it work. Good Luck!

Barnes & Noble: Are You Kidding Me?

And just when I thought I was in the clear, Barnes & Noble decided to draw my attention. SIGH. It's so sparkly, I couldn't help myself! But, their website? Imagine a slightly more posh version of Ingram Spark, just as picky. Their specs were different too, because why would anything be consistent? So back to the drawing board I go, tweaking yet another version of the book so it would fit their precise demands. More to come on this one once I get through it!!!

The Real MVPs: The Formatting Tools

During this wild ride, I tried every tool under the sun—Word, Designr, Vellum, Atticus. You name it, I tried it. Each one had its quirks, its learning curves, and its “why the hell isn’t this working” moments. But ultimately, some of them saved my sanity when Word just wasn’t cutting it.

Why This Matters: Real Talk

So why am I telling you all of this? Because this part of being an author is like a dark little secret no one talks about. You think writing is the hard part, and then formatting comes along to remind you that nothing in life worth doing is easy. The real world of self-publishing is filled with hidden hurdles like this, and I want you to know that if you’re struggling through it too, you’re not alone.

Plus, this is all just the start. I’m still working on getting Kind Transparency out there on more platforms. So if you’re thinking, “Damn, she’s really out here doing the most,” you’re absolutely right. And you better believe I’ll keep sharing what I learn along the way.

What’s Next?

Stay tuned, because in future blog posts, I’m going to break down some of the tools that actually worked, some of the ones that almost drove me to madness, and the differences between ebook and print formatting. And if you’re already one of my readers, first of all, thank you! Second, if you picked up the ebook, make sure you re-download it to get those nice little formatting tweaks I uploaded. It might just make your reading experience that much better.

A Favor to Ask

And hey, if you’ve made it this far, how about doing me a solid? Leave a review for Kind Transparency—let me know what you liked, what you didn’t, and what you want to see more of. It all helps as I work on the next books in the series and try to keep this wild publishing journey on track.

Here’s to the chaos of learning, the thrill of progress, and all the curveballs that come with self-publishing!